Monday, February 11, 2008

What is Home?

I am a sovereign prince of Egypt
A son of the proud history that’s shown
Etched on every wall
Surely this is all I ever wanted
All I ever wanted
All I ever
Wanted
-The Prince of Egypt


This is such a poignant song of longing and belonging sung by the character of Moses in this recent adaptation of the age old Exodus story. But the true beauty of this story, is that these sentiments are not the end. Character development, right?

Up until now, this is all that Moses has wanted. To belong here in this comfortable household. But God is calling him out into the unknown. Out on this journey that will through all its hardships and joys, teach Moses that his desires were in fact, too small. He actually will come to desire the LORD in that way. Surely THIS is all I ever wanted.

I think of Moses’ journey and this song especially right now as I’m nearing so many changes in life. Though I am not graduating in 3 short months, many of my close friends are. Their lives (and mine) will be altered forever. I follow in little over a year to a place of being uprooted from this dearly beloved and comfortable haven of Chapel Hill. What I have once considered home, will be so no longer.

I’ve gone through this before, when I left Jamestown to come to Chapel Hill. It was a process of letting go of my original concept of home, and realizing where my TRUE home lies. I think as humans it’s easy to find contentment where we are and in the comforts that surround us. The fact that I’ve lived in Joyner for two years is comfortable to me. I’d like to stay here. Walk past Davis library and on up the steps into my home. Have a cup of cider in my room, across from my lovely, funny, vibrant neighbors. Go for a run in the forest. Stay up until 2 a.m. in the first floor lobby – a veritable living room of sorts. So much like I imagine the Gryffindor common room.

But God periodically calls us out of our comfort so that we will realize our dependency on Him, just like He called Moses. Right now my vision has been for Joyner and Chapel Hill as “all I ever wanted.” Through the next few years, God will be painfully prying loose my fingers from what I hold dear, to see that only He is “all I ever wanted.”

I can follow Him next year to Connor, or wherever else I end up living. It will be a precursor to the even bigger move of following Him into the utter unknown of Los Angeles the year after.

I am excited to see “the change You sow” as Caedmon’s Call sings. I can’t wait to see the incredible things God does in my life and the lives of my friends. Change is exciting for the possibilities and also because it stands in direct contrast to the “Only One” that never changes (like Lifehouse sings).

For anyone interested in reading what I thought about the concept of “home” at the end of my freshman year of college, check out my old Xanga here. Another interesting post is what I wrote right after my first semester of intense transition. That link is here.

Have a beautiful day, my friends! Be shaken up by the unsettling Love.

1 comment:

Kyle said...

2 quotes for you. The first is my senior quote from Wesleyan.

"A ship at harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for."

The second is from the film Garden State.

"You'll see when you move out it just sort of happens one day and that feeling of home is gone. And you can never get it back. It's like you get homesick for a place that doesn't exist. I mean it's like this rite of passage, you know? You won't have this feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, you know, for your kids, for the family you start, it's like a cycle or something. I miss the idea of it. Maybe that's all family really is. A group of people who miss the same imaginary place."

It is wonderful to see hoe God changes us as we move all around the world and have to deal with changes. I love the idea of creating a new home for myself.